Conquering Self-Doubt
This topic contains 13 replies, has 11 voices, and was last updated by 
Bruce Hoag 7 years ago.
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Topic
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Recently I heard someone say you don’t want to be “running enthusiastically in the wrong direction!”
How do you get past the self-doubt that you’re spending your time at the wrong things? Maybe it’s just a lack of patience but I always seem to worry that I’ll spend all my time doing something that just doesn’t work.
I know there are no guarantees. Maybe I’m just missing a good solid foundation to build on.
Any thoughts?
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Replies
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I hear ya, Diana. I’ve so many irons in the fire that I don’t know what I’m cooking.
Here’s something to consider: If you want water, drill a well. If you drill far enough, you’ll get it … but you have to stick with one well. Better to drill 1,000 feet with one well than to drill 1,000 wells one foot deep. And it really doesn’t matter which location you choose (as long as it eventually leads to water).
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Don, I LOVE your answer!!!
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Remember it is easier to steer a vehicle that is already moving. Your car breaks down and you try and push it out of the way of the traffic but you cannot steer it very easily until it is actually moving. There are other little tricks like making sure all the levers such as the brakes are positioned in a way that helps rather than hinders. On the other hand if you have ever tried pushing a car with the brakes on you won’t do it again. You have learnt more about what to do from doing the wrong thing so in the long run you have benefitted form your mistake.
God's Lily is "a voice for those frustrated by the slow progress towards a fair society where the needs of the weakest are met in a way that it strengthens them rather than weakens them further" . If that includes you then hop on over and have a look around. If you like what you see it would be a good idea to sign up to receive our blog broadcasts. Oh and you will get a couple of pdf files that explain the what and why behind the site when
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Maybe you don’t know this, but all entrepreneurs have self-doubt.
And if you happen to be in a “creative art” – writing, music, drawing (painting, etc) and so on, you’ll be prone to it.
Self-doubt comes from basic insecurity, and we’re all insecure to a certain extent, especially in areas that we know very little about.
Now add to that the fact that you’re trying to change the lives of people by doing something that no one else has done.
You get the idea.
The truth is, and Sean will tell you this as well, is that you won’t know what works until it does.
You have to just keep at it.
You can get guidance by attending Sean’s coaching calls, but you still have to do what he suggests. It might work, or it might not.
You have to press on.
The key thing is to separate the idea that failing to achieve what you’re trying to do is not personal failure.
Trust me.
You’ll have a breakdown if you can’t keep the two apart.
Just recognize that all successful entrepreneurs got there by persistence.
They worked on a problem until they figured out how to solve it.
As long as you have a clear conscience about what you’re doing, then you should press on.
The self-doubt may never go away completely.
You have to accept that.
But instead of letting that limit what you do, use it as a means to motivate you to prove that it’s wrong.
Bruce Hoag PhD
The Internet Marketing Psychologist
The Mindful Writer - for deep and persuasive copy -
Sean teaches something I and others have been saying for years, but I don’t hear anyone but Sean teaching it in IM.
Find your purpose. Figure out how you can help people in your personal way. Discover your drive, your desire to solve a problem or area of problems. If you aren’t passionate about what you do, you will find it hard to stick to it. If you aren’t helping the world by helping people, then there will be no long term success in what you do.
If you have little knowledge in that area, realize your interest in that area is truly valuable.
This is a people business, even though through the internet it isn’t face to face. The Chinese say a man without a smile shouldn’t open a shop. You have to find the work where your “Smile” is.
When I went to Africa as a missionary, I had no super, special missionary training, but I did more good the first day than 500 people that said it couldn’t be done. Start where you are and just pitch in.
In 12 step programs they want you to believe in a power greater than you and outside of you. The reason is, when you come up on a problem greater than your strength and personal resources, if you have access to a higher power you still have hope and a path to victory.
It isn’t popular to say it, but there is a spiritual element to success and a truly happy life. It is through helping others, charity, contribution and giving of ourselves that gives our life meaning and provides our greatest happiness.
When I wonder and doubt I know what I am doing, since I believe we all have a purpose and are intended to help people, I still believe God knows what He is doing.
If you are really helping people, then you can’t fail. Help people first and the money and ways to grow will come later, but if the foundation isn’t helping people, then anything you do is unsustainable.
Search your heart. Find the place you can help people. Then examine what you are doing. Does this advance you in helping people in your personal way? If so proceed without fear. If not back up and get back on that path. That is your test and compass.
Don’t listen to critics. Don’t expect overnight progress. Just move ahead and in time you will be surprised at how far you have traveled.
I never did anything to help someone that I ever regretted. When you help others you know you are on the right track.
Scott Hogue CChH
Scott Hogue CChH
Follow me in the "Use What You Learn Challenge" as I create a website using what I learn from Sean that is a Platform for my niche:
http://www.threestepstowealth.comThe thread on this group that explains it:
http://preneurpal.com/forums/topic/own-the-game-and-win-it/#post-1747 -
Just remember that when self-doubt walks in the front door success runs out the back.
We all have it from time to time, but lots of great answers so far here – stay the course – more will be revealed as you move forward. 🙂
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Wow, Scott… I have never heard anyone put it exactly the way that you just did! I quote you:
“…there is a spiritual element to success and a truly happy life. It is through helping others, charity, contribution and giving of ourselves that gives our life meaning and provides our greatest happiness.”
I really needed to hear that! It was by way of my spirituality that I ever survived my most difficult life, but, for some reason, I associate financial gain and success with danger. This is because so many successful people did me so much harm. Deep inside my psyche, I don’t want to be anything like them or have anything to do with them… so I remain in my stubborn defiance by remaining poor.
It is like I am surgically removing that part of a healthy life, altogether… and this is what keeps me broke.
How comforting it is to remember that money can actually be spiritual! Making money through helping and contributing to others is actually a spiritual practice.
Thank you, Scott! Like I said, I really needed to hear that.
♥ Coach Claire
Discover the joy in every situation...
FREE full reading of your choice - for members only!
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Diana, as Sean always says, taking any kind of action is better than not taking any action at all. Susan is so right when she speaks about momentum. Even if all your actions fail miserably, you have still created momentum for yourself and it becomes quite easy to make the changes you need to make in order to become successful – no matter when that happens. Every successful person failed again and again until they finally became successful. That is the only path to success and I just wish more successful people in our society would admit this to the masses so the rest of us wouldn’t feel like such failures. Anyone who has had it easy does not have the skills it takes to be any kind of successful entrepreneur. Are mistakes and failures really mistakes and failures?! Without mistakes and failures, a person could never learn anything, help anyone or be of any kind of value to anyone or anything.
♥ Coach Claire
Discover the joy in every situation...
FREE full reading of your choice - for members only!
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Thanks, Diana for posting this question! It has brought some beautiful comments out of people. My 2 cents is that self-doubt is learned. I am a grandmother, and my grandson taught me such an important lesson when he learned to walk. He tried and failed many times…he just never used those failures to decide he might not learn to walk. He never gave up. A few times he fell hard and hurt himself. Even with that powerful painful lesson he still didn’t decide he couldn’t do it. And then one day he walked. Simple as that.
If we can cultivate that child-like mindset of not making failure mean anything about our ultimate success we are much freer to just do our best, try, see what works and do more of that, see what doesn’t work and try something new. Working every day in simple faith that our desire to serve and contribute, and trusting that the inspired actions that arise from that desire are leaning us in the direction we need to go, no matter the immediate outcome.
Best wishes on your journey!
KristinKristin van Tilburg
Stressed out? Overwhelmed?
Visit my website to receive a free 5 day email mini-class in dealing with overwhelm!
www.StrategicSuccessMindset.com -
Diana, great post/question. We all have self-doubt from time to time and often feel like we are running enthusiastically in the wrong direction. But…I think being part of this Community is a huge step toward answering and changing that. As we move forward we’ll get (hopefully) candid critique of the direction we are running and be able to make better and more informed decisions. I think one of the most important things is to realize that consistency is what it is all about. Sean is a huge encouragement to just keep at it until you succeed. If you get the right input from the Community and make sure you’re running the right direction, then stay running, you’ll make it.
Another thing I’ve heard a few times recently in regards to his is that you can’t climb more than one mountain at a time. That has always been my biggest problem. I try to go so many directions that no one direction gets the effort it deserves. So my new goal is to climb ONE mountain and succeed at it and THEN do the next.
If you're looking for a someone to bounce things off of in the IM world, I'm your guy and I really would love to help you out. Helping others is just who I am!
To Change Your Life Forever check out me out at http://IM-Specialist.com
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Diana,
I think all of us in this industry have been afflicted with some degree of self-doubt at one time or another. You just have to decide what path you want to take and follow through.
We all get pulled in so many directions that it makes focus seemingly impossible.
What has gotten me past this is focusing on one goal and seeing that goal to the end. For example, do I need to create a list in Aweber today?
Create it.
Do I need to write an email to my subscribers today?
Do it.
Do I need to write a blog post today?
Write it.
It’s amazing, but a laser focus gets things done that you may have never thought possible. You can get way more done in an hour than you ever could have imagined.
Don’t believe it? Try it.
Write it.
Talk soon.
Unlock the key to earning thousands per day. Leads, sales, and profits await. Click here.
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Self-doubt also keeps you from “believing your own press.”
By that I mean that it’s easy to get so caught up in what we’re doing that we’re blind-sided by someone else.
This is how industries get disrupted.
If the market leaders had been paying attention, then they would’ve seen the changes coming.
A dose of healthy self-doubt would’ve kept them on their toes.
Bruce Hoag PhD
The Internet Marketing Psychologist
The Mindful Writer - for deep and persuasive copy -
There’s a book that might help you.
I think Sean recommended it to me.
It’s called Start with Why by Simon Sinek.
If we get too caught up in what we’re doing and forget why, then we’ll lose our way.
That’s because when it gets hard, the effort will seem meaningless.
Bruce Hoag PhD
The Internet Marketing Psychologist
The Mindful Writer - for deep and persuasive copy
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